“required for healing as effectively as possible: Detach completely from the individual (unless you are tied to that person with kids, etc., and if this is your situation, put safety measures in place). Feel, and I mean deeply feel, everything about what you are experiencing or have experienced. Identify and address any underlying mental health or addiction issues you may have, and seek professional help. Eat healthy foods, reduce or remove alcohol from your life, and exercise daily. Spend time alone healing before you get into another relationship. Identify what was missing from your life when you allowed an abusive person in. What voids were you not filling yourself that caused you to settle for a toxic relationship? Build healthy female friendships if you are a woman or healthy male relationships if you are a man. Be of service to your community. All victims of domestic abuse end up isolated, and learning to feel connected is a critical step to healing. Find a spiritual or religious practice that provides you with support and guidance. Acknowledge what happened to you, all of what happened to you. Own every single word of your story. Forgive your abuser. And forgive yourself.”

— The Romeo & Juliet Delusion: Finding Freedom After Trauma: A Memoir by Lori Abbott